Anxiety is an emotion characterized by an unpleasant state of inner turmoil, often accompanied by nervous behavior, such as pacing back and forth, physical symptoms such as butterflies in the stomach, heart palpitations, shortness of breath, ruminating about everything you are thinking about and more. It is those unpleasant feelings of dread over anticipated events. Anxiety is not the same as fear, which is a response to a real or perceived immediate threat, Whereas anxiety is the expectation of future threat. Anxiety is a feeling of uneasiness and worry, usually generalized and unfocused as an overreaction to a situation that is only subjectively seen as menacing. It is often accompanied by muscular tension, restlessness, fatigue and problems in concentration. Anxiety can be appropriate, but when experienced regularly the individual may suffer from an anxiety disorder. What triggers anxiety? When felt appropriately, anxiety is beneficial and can keep you out of harm's way… the anxiety you may feel while hiking near a steep drop-off, for instance, will cause you to be more careful and purposeful in your movements. Or when the senses pick up a threat such as a loud noise, a scary sight, uneasiness about a future event or creepy feeling this information goes to our brain and the fight or flight response kicks in. Triggers are issues that make your anxiety worse or more prevalent. Some common triggers are:
So how do we relieve ourselves from all that anxiety? If anxiety is severe, medication can help. But first try the suggestions below and use medication only as a last resort.
Don't let anyone tell you that you have to "live with" anxiety. The above suggestions should bring you relief but if you feel your anxiety needs more attention don’t put off getting further assistance. Sure, the going can get tough, but it becomes harder the longer you wait, put things off, and give in to it. Research shows that participating in therapy can bring significant relief. Your therapist can help you learn to focus on more positive thoughts, search for triggers that you keep getting stuck on and help you move through them and help you find specific goals which you can reach for. You can feel better. Don’t hesitate to reach out for support when needed. I am a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who can provide services with anyone who resides in the State of California. I have also been trained in Clinical Hypnotherapy which is beneficial for more specific goals. Liz Birch, LMFT, CHt ~ 714-584-6047 ~ LizBirchMFT@gmail.com
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The therapy process is a time and place for you to open up about your thoughts and feelings. Especially the one’s you find the most difficult to talk about. It’s those stories from our past, the ones often forgotten, mostly by choice, that are having a profound impact on your life now. But I know that sharing those stories from your past isn’t easy. You’ve tucked them away for a reason. When in therapy with me, I share that our past events, in part, shape who we are and it's important that we take a look at it. Many don't want to go there. But in order for us to understand what is happening now it’s important that the stories of your life experiences come to light. It’s very scary, I know. But the process doesn’t have to be scary or intensely direct. I often tell my clients, when they are having difficulty verbalizing their emotions or thoughts, to journal write. It’s a very freeing, liberating and sometimes a scary experience that you can do where you are most comfortable – in your home, at the park, or wherever you choose. Journal writing helps you move toward self-discovery. It will help you make sense of the chaos that may be surrounding you. It’s helps resolve traumas that you may have experienced which is holding you back from your potential. And it’s a safe way of looking at the past, which can inspire you to move forward. In journal writing you don’t need to be a seasoned writer. Just grab a pen, notepad, journal book, or your computer and be ready with an open mind. Journal writing is a wonderful outlet for letting go of your bottled up emotions. If you are feeling sad, happy, excited or angry, write it down. Release what ever you are thinking and don’t worry about grammar. Sometimes you may find yourself just writing single words; sometimes it’s a sentence. You might be someone who draws pictures. Just let you mind focus on what you are feeling, don’t hold back, write it down. I assure you the feeling is liberating and powerful. If you find it’s bringing about upsetting feelings please bring that to your therapist. She/he can help you process the unsettling thoughts and bring you toward a place of acceptance. One of the benefits of journal writing, since it captures all of your unfiltered reflections, is you will begin to understand who you are. It will also help you see a solution and help you find healing. Journal writing will help you see who you are and changes you might want to make. My suggestions for Journal Writing;
Journal writing has been used effectively for grief and loss; coping with life-threatening or chronic illness; recovery from addictions, eating disorders and trauma; repairing troubled marriages and family relationships; increasing communication skills; developing healthier self-esteem; getting a better perspective on life; and clarifying life goals. I am a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who can provide services with anyone who resides in the State of California. I have also been trained in Clinical Hypnotherapy which is beneficial for more specific goals. Liz Birch, LMFT, CHt ~ 714-584-6047 ~ LizBirchMFT@gmail.com I feel blessed and grateful with the many clients I work with. I cherish the moment when they begin to feel a sense of safety and trust and their most personal life begins to emerge. But for most, it doesn’t begin at the first meeting or two. As they sit across from me I hear the basics of their family, their childhood, and their friends. I then hear about their co-workers, peers and neighbors. I see the dance happen as they talk about everything except what they really want and need to share. I can feel their pain much before they realize it. Many of my clients share they feel comfortable with me quickly but the more difficult part is getting the guts to bring it all up - the real story. Most fear if they dredge it all up it’ll never end. They fear they will cry and never be able to stop. They fear the ugly past will rear its head more vicious then before when all they want to do is forget about it. There are so many fears when one considers the choice to open up the past. I understand that and I give my clients as much space as they need – to a point. At the beginning of therapy with me I hone in on goals. What is it that you, the client, want to accomplish? Some say, “I’m tired of feeling sad all the time”, “I want my out-of-control anger to end”, “I just don’t feel right and not sure why”. The reasons vary why people come to see me. But they walk in my door because they know they need to make a change. They know they have a story to tell. As I tell many of my clients, we all have a story. Every single person we encounter has a story. Please tell me yours. The stories that many of us live with are often deeply ingrained in our unconscious. We carry that unconscious past around daily, which creates anxiety, depression, resentment, prejudice, anger, hurt and much more. Our stories dictate how we view ourselves, how we view others, and how we perceive life in general. Even though life may seemingly be going well now, our life stories can weigh us down, keep us angry or sad, and prevent us from feeling joy, happiness, or even content. It isn’t until we open up the past, talk about it, purge it, dig in deep and explore it that we begin to feel some freedom. Living with our past stuck in our unconscious can be life draining. Remaining in that place affects our daily decisions, how we judge others, why we hold on to resentment or jealousy. In therapy, as you sit across from me, we can discuss your life story, the ugly past. I want you to share it all with me. It’s when we bring the unconscious to the conscious the freedom and change begins. Trust me when I say, you won’t cry forever and you won’t be stuck there by dredging it all up again. Rather, it’s the dredging it all up again that can be freeing. By default our brain likes to go to the negativity. So together we work on re-writing your story to shift that focus. What statements are you telling yourself? “My parents always told me I was a loser, therefore that must be true and I will never amount to much so why try?” “My uncle abused me so I will never be happy and will always feel depressed.” “I was blindsided at that business meeting, others judged me just as I’ve always been judged in the past.” “My spouse left me for another person therefore I should never trust anyone again.” Statements such as these all relate to your past and present. Using small steady steps we can begin the process of change. It might be time for you to make a change, make a move, confront the past and search ever so deep for some good that may have come out of it. Change is difficult. And re-writing or retelling your story toward better mental health is more complex than looking for the bright side of our past situations. That’s why we work on this together and recast “I’ll never forgive” or “I’m stuck with who I am,” into a new mold. It’s probably difficult for you to imagine finding anything positive out of your past but it’s there. Look at your options. You can stay with what you have, and you know how that makes you feel, or you can be open to looking at your life from a different lens. Maybe you can find many benefits from your experiences or maybe only a couple. But what’s important is that you grab any benefit there is from your life experiences and focus on it. When you look at life from a different perspective you will be surprised how much better and empowered you can feel. So, are you ready to tell your story? I am a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who can provide services with anyone who resides in the State of California. I have also been trained in Clinical Hypnotherapy which is beneficial for more specific goals. Liz Birch, LMFT, CHt ~ 714-584-6047 ~ LizBirchMFT@gmail.com Anger is a natural, though sometimes unwanted or irrational, emotion that everybody experiences from time to time. But sometimes we let this “anger” take over our lives. While anger is in place primarily as a way of surviving and protecting us, too much of it can lead to detrimental emotional and physical changes. It can cause havoc in our own daily lives and for those we are closest to. Constant anger can lead to depression, eating disorders, alcoholism and self-injury along with high blood pressure, increased heart rate, and increased adrenaline. Intense and constant anger can negatively affect your business relationships and especially your relationships with those you love the most. It can make a person rude, unapproachable and just plain hard to live with. Anger is a secondary emotion, which is caused by and hides a deeper emotion. If your friend is untruthful to others about something you have done, you may get angry when what you are really feeling is hurt or betrayed. Anger is often caused by deep sadness and, most often of all; it’s caused by fear. Next time you are angry, slow down and really think about what you are “feeling”. Could you actually be feeling hurt, disappointed or are you fearful of something? Any management of anger will require you to look at the deeper reasons for it. Sometimes, these may be half-forgotten, avoided, denied or buried. Often anger can be a need for control - of others, events or yourself. It is also often an existential issue caused by lack of meaning, loss, isolation or lack of freedom. If you address the deeper issues in counseling, you’ll begin to see certain triggers that present themselves which bring about your anger. Once these triggers are identified you can start to lower the amount of anger. Resentment is a very corrosive, hidden and unpleasant form of anger. It’s a mixture of jealousy, frustration, bitterness and harbored injustice. It is a real joy killer. You simply cannot be happy if you have deep-seated resentments about someone close to you. It’s better to talk it over and see if you can reach a compromise. Ask yourself if the resentment you feel towards the other is about what you lack rather than what they have and address that honestly and positively in your own life – asking them to help with it as much as they can. If anger is taking over you and negatively affecting your daily life with those you love, or those you work with, please seek out a therapist so you can begin the process of healing. I am a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who can provide services with anyone who resides in the State of California. I have also been trained in Clinical Hypnotherapy which is beneficial for more specific goals. Liz Birch, LMFT, CHt ~ 714-584-6047 ~ LizBirchMFT@gmail.com Alexithymia is a clinical term for the inability to understand the intricacies of feelings and emotions. The existence and study of alexithymic experiences started in the 1970's. Some research suggests that alexithymia is more predominant in men than in women and is prevalent in approximately 10% of the general population. Alexithymia is also understood to have two components; a cognitive component where people might face challenges with thinking and emotions while trying to name, understand and talk about feelings, as well as an affective component where people might struggle with the experience of sharing, responding to and sensing emotions. People who experience the effects of alexithymia might have these symptoms: 1. Difficulty identifying feelings 2. Difficulty distinguishing between feelings and the bodily sensations 3. A lack of impulse control 4. Violent or disruptive outbursts 5. Difficulty describing feelings to other people 6. Heightened sensitivity to sights, sounds, or physical touch 7.Limited imagination and, therefore, little or no fantasies and limited dreams 8. An unawareness of what is happening in their own mind and a very concrete way of thinking. Alexithymia is known to be co-morbid with a number of psychiatric conditions. Therefore, when signs of Alexithymia are seen one might also look at depression, post traumatic stress disorder, brain injuries, substance abuse, and eating disorders, as it’s these diagnoses that one might harbor alexithymia. But where does it come from? How does one end up with this personality construct of marked dysfunction in emotional awareness, social attachment and interpersonal relating? Some research has indicated that events happening in a person’s early childhood such as neglect or abuse but there are also cases of witnessing a horrifying event is known to trigger alexithymia. If you, or someone you know, is displaying symptoms such as those described above please seek out the support of a licensed therapist. Therapy will often concentrate on building a foundation of naming emotions and appreciating a range of feelings. The process will likely include both consideration of the experiences of other people and self-reflection. For people who have no problem with emotional comprehension this might sound very basic, however, for a person with alexithymia the process of growing their emotional intelligence and capacity may be difficult. I am a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who can provide services with anyone who resides in the State of California. I have also been trained in Clinical Hypnotherapy which is beneficial for more specific goals. Liz Birch, LMFT, CHt ~ 714-584-6047 ~ LizBirchMFT@gmail.com Weiss, Thomas C. , Alexithymia: Information, Symptoms & Treatment Options, August 2012, Disabled World/heath/neurology/alexithymia 1. Try Progressive Relaxation All the way from fingers to toes - tense and then release each muscle group in the body (lower arm, upper arm, chest, back and abdominals, etc.). Once the body is relaxed, the mind will be soon to follow! 2. Breathe Deep Taking a deep breath has been shown to lower cortisol levels, which can help reduce stress and anxiety. Studies suggest deep breathing can also cause a temporary drop in blood pressure. 3. Spark Some Scents Studies suggest aromatherapy can be a good way to relieve stress. Give Lavender a try! Scientific evidence suggests that aromatherapy with lavender may slow the activity of the nervous system, improve sleep quality, promote relaxation, and lift mood in people suffering from sleep disorders. 4. Laugh It Off Laughter can reduce the physical effects of stress (like fatigue) on the body. Look for a laughter workshop in your area. They are out there! 5. Drink Tea One study found that drinking black tea leads to lower post-stress cortisol levels and greater feelings of relaxation. 6. Exercise That post-exercise endorphin rush is one way to sharply cut stress. Endorphins are often classified to be the happy hormones. Any form of physical activity leads to the release of these feel good neurotransmitters. The increase in endorphins in your body leads to a feeling of euphoria, modulation of appetite, the release of different sex hormones and an enhancement of immune response. This helps combat the negative effects of stress. 7. Listen To Music Research points to multiple ways in which music can help relieve stress, from triggering biochemical stress reducers to assisting in treating stress associated with medical procedures. According to a group of fancy Oxford University scientists, listening to the third movement of Beethoven's No. 9 might actually lower your blood pressure and help fight heart disease. In real life. Isn’t this surprising?? "Professor Sleight explained some composers, including Verdi, seemed to have managed to mirror the natural rise and fall of blood pressure in the human body. Verdi may well have been a physiologist,' he said, 'he hit on this ten-second rhythm in blood pressure and you can see it in his music.'" — Elizabeth Davis, Classic FM
I am a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who can provide services with anyone who resides in the State of California. I have also been trained in Clinical Hypnotherapy which is beneficial for more specific goals. Liz Birch, LMFT, CHt ~ 714-584-6047 ~ LizBirchMFT@gmail.com |
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