The Holidays and Entertaining those with Mental Health Issues

It’s hard to believe but December 2014 is here.  For most, that brings non-stop holiday stress.  You want to be sure all is taken care of, presents are purchased, wrapped and placed under the tree in time for the mass opening of them all.  You want to be sure you got Uncle Charley the perfect gift and picky Aunt Alice something that she won’t say she already has. 

You also want to be sure that everyone in the family is comfortable and happy.  It’s one thing to entertain extended family and friends throughout the year on a limited basis but to have everyone together at one time on the same evening…. well … can be a real stress provoker.  And what if one of your family members has a mental health issue. The holidays may bring lots of anxiety and/or heighten his/her symptoms.  Keep in mind, it may not necessarily be the “holiday’s” that is the stressor but it’s probably more likely the change in his/her schedule.  Having a routine is very comforting for may people and especially those trying to manage mental health issues.  When the routine is upset it may send those dependent on it in a bit of a tizzy. 

Here’s some tips that I hope you'll find helpful when trying to help those that are having difficulties during this time of year. 

• Accept imperfection. If everything doesn’t go as planned it’s okay. What’s more important is that the person with the mental health issue is as comfortable as you can provide.

• If the person doesn’t drink, don’t push it. 

• Give them space if that’s what’s needed.  Don’t demand they sit next to busy body Aunt Alice if it’s too much for him/her to deal with. Let them choose where they want to sit even if it may be at a nearby location but not with everyone else. 

• Ask the person, in advance of the get together, what they will need to make them more comfortable.  That way you can be prepared for them without having to address is when all the guest are arriving.

• Set realistic goals and be flexible. The holidays are about love and caring for one another. It's not a time to try to impress others. 

Bottom line, despite all our good intentions, remember the holidays rarely turn out as planned.  Celebrate this season of hope and expectation. Celebrate the many blessings in your life and in those of who you love. 

Most importantly don't forget ... "Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus" *

May you all have a happy and stress free holiday!

*(unfamiliar with that phrase .. please visit it on Google)



​I am a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who can provide services with anyone who resides   in the State of California. I have also been trained in Clinical Hypnotherapy which is beneficial for more specific goals.
Liz Birch, LMFT, CHt ~ 714-584-6047 ~ [email protected]

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